Shock

This week I started using a TENS unit, which sends little pulses wherever I put the four little patches that connect to this nice little box. It feels like a tingly vibration--and the idea is that it helps retrain the muscles and prevent pain signals from reaching the brain. Thus the title "a shock."

I think "shock" is a good word to describe a lot of the experiences I've had the past few months. I always knew that God had a specific plan for me in mind, but I have been suprised to find out the more recent parts of that plan.

I think we all are a bit shocked at different twists and turns that come into our lives. The thing is that without those twists and turns, we wouldn't learn and grow. And that's the whole point of this life--that's what I spent each day of my mission teaching people--that God has a plan for us, that trials are meant to help us learn and grow, and that He loves us and knows what's best, even if we can't understand the reasons behind the trials in our lives.

One tendency I have in trials (also just in general) is to feel guilty. In this case, I have struggled with feeling guilty that I couldn't get better faster. I felt guilty for not being able to work very much, for holding my companions back, and for going home--for not being strong enough. But looking back, all of this has helped make me stronger--not physically, but spiritually. It has brought me closer to Jesus Christ, who knows how each and every kind of pain feels. Every muscle spasm. Every headache. Every tinge of guilt. Every shock.